it may make an appearance later today, or i may just wait till next week.
teaser:
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
rough start.
aaaand i forgot all about monday fun-day. oops.
it may make an appearance later today, or i may just wait till next week.
teaser:
it may make an appearance later today, or i may just wait till next week.
teaser:
Friday, March 26, 2010
more to come...
health update: follicular thyroid cancer was confirmed after my first surgery and my entire thyroid and the lymph nodes surrounding it were removed in a second surgery about 10 days ago. now we're waiting for my thyroid levels to be low enough so that i can do the radiation and then (hallelujah) get on some thyroid medication (i'm really interested in doing natural thyroid as opposed to synthroid - anyone out there familiar with it?) and level out again.
enough with that craziness.
per the request of my sister, hillary, and my own desire to blog more often, this monday will begin the first in a series of "monday fun-day" posts, which will most likely be a compilation of whatever fun things have been on my mind whether it be new music, clothes, places i'd like to go, recipes, whatever - basically it's a way to guarantee myself that i'll post and kinda get me back in the writing groove :). we'll see.
lots of love.
enough with that craziness.
per the request of my sister, hillary, and my own desire to blog more often, this monday will begin the first in a series of "monday fun-day" posts, which will most likely be a compilation of whatever fun things have been on my mind whether it be new music, clothes, places i'd like to go, recipes, whatever - basically it's a way to guarantee myself that i'll post and kinda get me back in the writing groove :). we'll see.
lots of love.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
the Lord is my shepherd.
i've been extremely hesitant to blog recently. there's a lot going on...a lot which could end up being nothing...but a lot for now. i don't want this blog to become a diatribe about the hard things in my life, but the Lord is teaching me a lot about how my circumstances don't need to be a reason to hide in a corner, but rather, when viewed correctly, they become a megaphone for proclaiming how good the Lord is to me...and therefore how good He is at all times, to all people. i'm not upset about what is going on in my life. please hear that before you read further. i have moments where things feel overwhelming, and i have times when i think about how simple things were before life started to spiral...but then i remember that neither of those things are true. i am not overwhelmed, for God is a shield about me. i am not being removed from the simple beauties of my 'previous' life, for God is the giver of all good things. those are the truths that i honestly believe.
let that be the lens for the rest of this post...
a few months ago, my gynocologist suggested that i have some bloodwork done on my thyroid levels, as there seemed to be a nodule on the left side of my thyroid. i had the bloodwork done and all my levels came back normal, but the general practitioner i saw (who sees DTS students for free...talk about a blessing) suggested that i have an ultrasound done on the nodule to discover the size, as it seemed kind of large. the ultrasound revealed that the nodule was 3.4 centimeters, and anything over 1 centimeter is strongly recommended to undergo a biopsy. so, i made an appointment with an endocrinologist who did the biopsy and called me a week later with some pretty surprising news.
we all knew that the chances this nodule represented cancer were 3/100, so no one was really all that concerned. well, turns out statistics don't always mean what we'd hope they do, and my doctor's phone call informed us of that. she said that her best diagnosis at this point is Follicular Thyroid Cancer. i know," cancer," the word practically makes us want to come out of our skin and run for the hills. BUT, while this type of thyroid cancer is less common and more aggressive than most types of thyroid cancer, thyroid cancer as a whole is absolutely the cancer you would want to choose if you had a line-up of cancers you had to pick from. it is usually treatable simply by removing the nodule, which will be happening for me in the next few weeks after a consultation with a neck surgeon tomorrow. if that doesn't remove it all, i'll undergo a treatment called Radioactive Iodine which is much less intense than it sounds. our prayer is that the cancer has not spread anywhere else, if it hasn't, this will probably all be over this time next month. if it has, God is still God, still good, and still the giver of all good things. we are not afraid.
the Lord has surrounded us with his peace and his people in the past few days. we've received countless text messages, emails, phone calls, and knocks on our door - each one strengthening our hearts and minds. i'm going to be using a lot of nutrional, natural methods to strengthen my immune systems and fight this (probable) cancer, and friends who eat gluten-free and vegan have been coming out of the woodwork. my Mom connected me with a nutritionist (who said I should still eat a little meat - my husband probably wants to fly down to Houston and hug him right now) and is assisting me beyond measure in understanding how my body naturally works and what i can do to restore my health if that's God's plan for me. though things are crazy at times and life looks so different than just a week ago, there hasn't been a moment where i couldn't say that God wasn't providing above and beyond our wildest dreams, exactly as He promised He would. friends and family have blessed us with finances, flowers, food, and sweeter moments of fellowship than we have perhaps ever known. this is all worth it. watching the body of Christ surround its members in need is one of the sweetest things i have ever seen. our hearts rejoice in knowing that we are loved.
how fitting that it's 3/3 and the verse resounding in my head is psalm 3:3. "but You, oh Lord, are a shield about me, my glory and the lifter of my head."
i'll keep you posted (what a silly pun). please pray for continued peace, strength, wisdom, and discernment, and above all thay Jared's and my hearts would be woven closer together and closer to the Lord...whatever it takes for those two things to happen is beyond worth it in our book. God is good, truly good, and those words mean more to me now than i ever knew they could.
let that be the lens for the rest of this post...
a few months ago, my gynocologist suggested that i have some bloodwork done on my thyroid levels, as there seemed to be a nodule on the left side of my thyroid. i had the bloodwork done and all my levels came back normal, but the general practitioner i saw (who sees DTS students for free...talk about a blessing) suggested that i have an ultrasound done on the nodule to discover the size, as it seemed kind of large. the ultrasound revealed that the nodule was 3.4 centimeters, and anything over 1 centimeter is strongly recommended to undergo a biopsy. so, i made an appointment with an endocrinologist who did the biopsy and called me a week later with some pretty surprising news.
we all knew that the chances this nodule represented cancer were 3/100, so no one was really all that concerned. well, turns out statistics don't always mean what we'd hope they do, and my doctor's phone call informed us of that. she said that her best diagnosis at this point is Follicular Thyroid Cancer. i know," cancer," the word practically makes us want to come out of our skin and run for the hills. BUT, while this type of thyroid cancer is less common and more aggressive than most types of thyroid cancer, thyroid cancer as a whole is absolutely the cancer you would want to choose if you had a line-up of cancers you had to pick from. it is usually treatable simply by removing the nodule, which will be happening for me in the next few weeks after a consultation with a neck surgeon tomorrow. if that doesn't remove it all, i'll undergo a treatment called Radioactive Iodine which is much less intense than it sounds. our prayer is that the cancer has not spread anywhere else, if it hasn't, this will probably all be over this time next month. if it has, God is still God, still good, and still the giver of all good things. we are not afraid.
the Lord has surrounded us with his peace and his people in the past few days. we've received countless text messages, emails, phone calls, and knocks on our door - each one strengthening our hearts and minds. i'm going to be using a lot of nutrional, natural methods to strengthen my immune systems and fight this (probable) cancer, and friends who eat gluten-free and vegan have been coming out of the woodwork. my Mom connected me with a nutritionist (who said I should still eat a little meat - my husband probably wants to fly down to Houston and hug him right now) and is assisting me beyond measure in understanding how my body naturally works and what i can do to restore my health if that's God's plan for me. though things are crazy at times and life looks so different than just a week ago, there hasn't been a moment where i couldn't say that God wasn't providing above and beyond our wildest dreams, exactly as He promised He would. friends and family have blessed us with finances, flowers, food, and sweeter moments of fellowship than we have perhaps ever known. this is all worth it. watching the body of Christ surround its members in need is one of the sweetest things i have ever seen. our hearts rejoice in knowing that we are loved.
how fitting that it's 3/3 and the verse resounding in my head is psalm 3:3. "but You, oh Lord, are a shield about me, my glory and the lifter of my head."
i'll keep you posted (what a silly pun). please pray for continued peace, strength, wisdom, and discernment, and above all thay Jared's and my hearts would be woven closer together and closer to the Lord...whatever it takes for those two things to happen is beyond worth it in our book. God is good, truly good, and those words mean more to me now than i ever knew they could.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
psalm 16:5-11
Lord, you give me stability and prosperity;
you make my future secure.
It is as if I have been given fertile fields
or received a beautiful tract of land.
I will praise the Lord who guides me;
yes, during the night I reflect and learn.
I constantly trust in the Lord;
because he is at my right hand, I will not be upended.
So my heart rejoices and I am happy
My life is safe.
You will not abandon me to Sheol;
you will not allow your faithful follower to see the Pit.
You lead me in the path of life;
I experience absolute joy in your presence;
you always give me sheer delight.
you make my future secure.
It is as if I have been given fertile fields
or received a beautiful tract of land.
I will praise the Lord who guides me;
yes, during the night I reflect and learn.
I constantly trust in the Lord;
because he is at my right hand, I will not be upended.
So my heart rejoices and I am happy
My life is safe.
You will not abandon me to Sheol;
you will not allow your faithful follower to see the Pit.
You lead me in the path of life;
I experience absolute joy in your presence;
you always give me sheer delight.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
inspired.
Jared and I just returned from an evening of Office watching and conversation with fun, deeply-thinking, God-loving friends. The guys, as they've been known to do, split off rather quickly to talk about their classes, theology, and whatever modalism is, and us ladies found our conversation drifting toward the newest big thing, the iPad. The discussion of Apple's newest creative venture eventually rabbit trailed into thoughts on how technology is influencing the communication, language, and relationships of today. We knew we weren't the first people to ever think of this issue, but as women who hope to be mothers someday and who value face to face interaction, deep community, closeness, and showing others who Jesus is through action...we found ourselves with quite a bit to say.
For example, texting is great. I love texting. Texting gets things accomplished and allows for information to be communicated without much trouble at all. Fabulous. I'm all about information and making plans and saying a quick hello. I've definitely been known to even have a texting conversation in my day, but that's where we thought things started to get a little hazy. Why not pick up the phone, or even send an email (something that at least has a distant reference to a thought out letter)?
And what about when we have kids? What about when our kids start feeling the pressure and need to feel connected? How will we help them form meaningful friendships, even mentorships, even if it's just a few? How do we teach the value that comes from depth and not just width? Come to think of it, how do we help ourselves believe in it?
I don't think texting or emailing or whatever else by default keeps people from having deep relationships. But I constantly notice with myself a need to feel connected and informed, and all too often I attempt to fill that need with facebook or a surface level text message. Why not pick up the phone and have a conversation? I have time. We all have time at some point. So, I suppose the question is, how are we spending it? What do we cherish and value? Relationships touch souls, and souls last forever. I just want to be sure I'm treasuring the souls in my life, not just surface level information.
One of my friends tonight said we're going to look up one day and realize that we're the most connected people in the world, yet also the loneliest. Lets find ways to make sure that's not the case, for the sake of Jesus Christ, the community He cherishes, and the generations He may allow us to touch.
For example, texting is great. I love texting. Texting gets things accomplished and allows for information to be communicated without much trouble at all. Fabulous. I'm all about information and making plans and saying a quick hello. I've definitely been known to even have a texting conversation in my day, but that's where we thought things started to get a little hazy. Why not pick up the phone, or even send an email (something that at least has a distant reference to a thought out letter)?
And what about when we have kids? What about when our kids start feeling the pressure and need to feel connected? How will we help them form meaningful friendships, even mentorships, even if it's just a few? How do we teach the value that comes from depth and not just width? Come to think of it, how do we help ourselves believe in it?
I don't think texting or emailing or whatever else by default keeps people from having deep relationships. But I constantly notice with myself a need to feel connected and informed, and all too often I attempt to fill that need with facebook or a surface level text message. Why not pick up the phone and have a conversation? I have time. We all have time at some point. So, I suppose the question is, how are we spending it? What do we cherish and value? Relationships touch souls, and souls last forever. I just want to be sure I'm treasuring the souls in my life, not just surface level information.
One of my friends tonight said we're going to look up one day and realize that we're the most connected people in the world, yet also the loneliest. Lets find ways to make sure that's not the case, for the sake of Jesus Christ, the community He cherishes, and the generations He may allow us to touch.
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